The Trap of Living on Factory Settings

Quiet Clarity is a 2x/week newsletter and podcast for people who want to build a life of presence, depth, and deliberate intention.

But you keep drifting.

So what if you could stop waiting and start designing?

I was a sophomore in high school, stuck in freshman math while my friends were taking calculus.

My routine was predictable: wake up, go to school, come home, fail at talking to girls, hang with friends, sleep. Repeat.

I kept telling myself that someday I'd get serious. Someday I'd actually do something with my life.

But months passed, and that "someday" never showed up.

Meanwhile, my friends were pulling ahead for the first time ever. They were taking harder classes, getting better grades, actually planning their futures while I was drifting through each day like a ghost.

That B in freshman math was my wake-up call.

I realized I'd been living on autopilot, following whatever path required the least effort. No real goals, no systems, no intention behind anything I did.

Just... existing.

Years later, I'd find myself in a different kind of drift. I'd saved some money from content creation and started going clubbing every weekend. It felt like I'd made it, like this was what success looked like.

But really? I was just filling a void.

My sleep was destroyed. I felt groggy all day. The only thing I looked forward to was the next weekend, the next escape.

This brings me to a story about three workers laying bricks on a construction site.

A traveler passed by and asked the first worker, "What are you doing?"

"Laying bricks," the man grunted, not even looking up.

He asked the second worker the same question.

"Building a wall," came the reply, with slightly more enthusiasm.

When he approached the third worker, the man's face lit up.

"I'm building a cathedral," he said with pride. "See that space there? That's where the bell tower will stand. And over there, the great stained glass windows that will fill the sanctuary with colored light. Every brick I lay is part of something magnificent."

Years passed.

The first man was still laying bricks, bitter about his aching back and meager wages.

The second had become a foreman, competent but uninspired.

But the third? He'd become the master architect, designing cathedrals across the country that would stand for centuries.

The difference wasn't talent or luck or connections.

It was vision.

The third worker didn't just see bricks - he saw the cathedral they would become. He understood how every single brick fit into the larger plan. He wasn't just working; he was building something meaningful.

And because he could see the end result, he knew exactly which bricks to lay and where. He worked backward from the vision, making every action intentional.

While others drifted through their days laying random bricks, he was constructing his masterpiece.

That's the power of reverse engineering your life - when you know what cathedral you're building, every brick has a purpose.

What cathedral am I building with my days?

I started by writing out my ideal day in ridiculous detail. Not some fantasy where I'm on a yacht, but a day I could actually live over and over and feel fulfilled.

Who would I be with? What would I be creating? How would my body feel? What would give me energy versus drain it?

Then I worked backward.

If that's the cathedral, what bricks do I need to lay today?

First, I had to clear the weeds. Those clubbing nights had to go. Not all at once. Each month, I went out a little less. By semester's end, I'd replaced the void with things that actually fed my soul:

Then came the systems. Because motivation is like sugar - quick energy that crashes fast. Systems are like protein - sustainable fuel that builds real strength.

For gaining weight (I was that 6'1", 130-pound kid), I created simple systems:

No daily decisions needed. Just follow the system.

From 9th to 12th grade, I gained over 60 pounds. Not through willpower, but through systems that made success inevitable.

You know that moment when you realize you've been living by default?

That's not failure. That's the wake-up call.

The difference between drifting and designing isn't massive action. It's small, intentional choices compounded daily.

Remove one thing that drains you. Add one thing that energizes you. Build one system that makes success automatic. Take one action today instead of "someday."

Because here's what I learned from that freshman math class and those wasted weekends:

Every day you wait is a brick laid in someone else's cathedral.

So try this:

Tonight, write out your ideal day. Not your fantasy day - your ideal regular day.

Then ask: "What's one brick I can lay tomorrow to build toward that?"

Not ten bricks. Not the whole cathedral. Just one intentional brick.

Because the master architect was right:

They all begin the same way - one brick at a time.